Monday, 5 March 2018


Hey guys, I'm back posting again with some new content that seems to have aligned with my core beliefs and moral values a lot than they have before. I was too caught up with my ego. If you follow me on Instagram, I began to realise, my content felt quite forced. I was getting obsessed with likes and views on photos and videos. Videos of me dressed provocatively eating vegan food in a way that could be perceived sexualised. Now I had to take a long hard think about my actions and how they could effect this world. I was becoming quite selfish and not actually thinking how I could help and benefit those. I always want to help people the best ways I can and I thought by being over sexy would encourage woman to not be ashamed of being provocative or looking 'sexy' because we OWNED it. We wanted to dress that way. It was a way to empower women, to show them that they can do this if they wanted to. But personally for me, it was getting the wrong attention. Random men were messaging me with sexualised questions, I was getting followed by strange accounts and targeted by men that encouraged me to keep pushing this content out. Yeah probably because you can go jerk off at it behind your computer screen. This thought made me feel uncomfortable. Yeah, we shouldn't feel the need to hide our female power of dressing sexy, but is it really a socially constructed concept created by society to exploit women?

These were the thoughts I kept thinking over and over again whilst trying to fall asleep at night. After studying social media and consumeristic behaviour during my photography arts degree, this was something that I always have views that were constantly changing. "No I want to be sexy and show that I own it or no I hate it I, I hate the fact we as women are seen as sexual objects in society"Now coming to think about it, the use of make up, clothes, beauty products, poses in photos, all can portray sexualised connotations. They aren't changing the social construct, they are contributing to it. If they are changing the construct, then how? Wouldn't you think going the opposite direction and rebelling against the system, the use of cosmetics, shavers, make up and anything that makes a woman pressurised to look a certain way. Would benefit all of our wellbeing, and create a more real world where we are more in touch with the human side to us? This is something we want to try and get rid off. I realised how restrictive make up made me feel, and how personal style confined me so a stereotype. Its a way for some yes, to express themselves creatively, and others its there to hide imperfections, spots, dark lines, signs of aging, enhance lips to make them look fuller with liner. All little insecurities, triggered off by the media, highlighting the little things that make us unique and different and considering them IMPERFECTIONS?  They benefit financially off making us hate them, making us doubt and question our worth through looks?

My personal experience of make up, I've always used lots of it to hide behind. Red lipstick to look feminine, drawn on thick eyebrows because I lack any hair in that region. Blusher and Bronzer because my face is pale and has no shape? and pale is considered sickly in todays society with their beauty standards. Every time I would wake up in the morning, I couldn't go downstairs because I was insecure I had no make up on, I looked pale, spotty, bags under my eyes, especially blue veins. I felt like I shouldn't be looked at, because people would judge. I also spent way too much time getting ready in the mornings, about two hours to try and perfect my make up and hair to look good for when I went out in public. How messed up is that? it really takes our time away from something when we could be putting our efforts into something much more beneficial. I couldn't even go to the nearest corner shop in fear that guys would judge me, people would stare or someone would comment if I was unwell? It's like the lack of effort a woman puts into her appearance suggests how much she thinks of herself, this is really what society has come to? Looks define success?  as well as sexual attention and attraction from the opposite sex? Usually these types of people who are attracted to the way you look, or your style or what watch your wearing, what brand is your handbag. Are often people who don't think that much deeper into the spiritual side of life. They don't question the ways consumerism enslaves us into spending money on things we don't need that restricts and controls our minds.

Anyway, theres a few thoughts to think about, its something I've always been quite passionate about, anti-consumerism. Seeing photoshopped women in magazines with flawless skin, or unrealistic expectations of beauty. It has always angered me how women were perceived this way, for men to look at, for men to win in their lives. Well as part of my spiritual journey, I reached out to my spirit guide and once we met, my views and my path in life changed. How funny can life be? He told me to follow the child in me, the one who loves nature, doesn't care about my appearance, uses clothes as a fun way to dress up as characters, who doesn't care about the way others view me. That's happy and carefree, we all forget this inner child that once viewed the world in such a beautiful positive way and I hope to find that mindset and explore it further. I know it will take a lot of getting use to without no make up completely but each day I am wearing less and less and becoming more confident around my family. So many years of social conditioning has to be rewired.

Lots of love,

Charlotte x

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